Wed., Oct. 22

- My “fairy godmother” seems to have lost interest. Not sure how much longer we would have been able to keep that up anyway

Sun., Oct. 19 – Tue., Oct. 21

- Have spent Monday and Tuesday typing up ‘fichas’ (questionnaires) for the Patrimonio Cultural project. The goal was to be completely finished with them by Tuesday, but of course we got backed up and behind. So I actually brought my computer home on Monday and stayed in San Nicolas until 7:30pm (having gotten there at 8am for the first time in a while) on Tuesday and am still not quite finished. But I guess a few days of hard work isn’t so bad, considering that I often have barely enough to keep my occupied. And the ‘fichas’ are actually quite interesting in between the hard-to-read handwriting and creative spelling. And there was one ‘ficha’ in particular about the group of survivors of the massacre at La Quesera (copied from a professionally-written article of some sort, it seemed) that finally moved me almost to tears, the way normal people react to war stories. It talked about one man in particular named Salvador who lost his wife and several children. His 9-year-old daughter was one of the children rounded up onto a government helicopter and then dropped into the Rio Lempa. Except she didn’t fall into the river, but into a tree, where he found her body some time later, recognizable by a string on her finger. He found his wife’s body tied to a tree, where she’d been forced to watch as soldiers raped another daughter. He buried his family in a cornfield and made a small cross out of sticks and wire, then didn’t talk about it again for 20 years. I can barely imagine living through something like that, never mind living with afterwards. Eckhart Tolle (author whose book I’m currently reading) says it pretty well when he talks about our collective human insanity – I just don’t understand how people can do such horrible things to other people. Yet it’s happened time and time again throughout history. Yet we also have such a capacity for love and compassion – what a weird species.

Sat., Oct. 18

- Had a nice talk with Robyn yesterday. Apparently she’s also having some “What am I doing here? Am I any good at what I do?” feelings. So at least I’m not the only one, and it was nice to have someone to talk to who understands. She still at least seems like she knows what she’s doing a whole lot more than me, however, working so closely with Tania on the Patrimonio Cultural project and the whole youth program.

Mon., Oct 13 – Wed. Oct. 15

- Made an appointment with the WM Career Center for Dec. 18 and took a little online career-finder quiz/ profile. So I’m feeling like the quarter-life crisis is a little more under control.

- I met Maritza’s new baby on Monday. Apparently she had him on Thursday and he doesn’t have a name yet. He cried when I held him on Monday but was asleep when I held him on Tuesday. She didn’t say anything about me being hid godmother, so I’ll just keep assuming she wasn’t really serious. Unless she actually does say something, in which case I’ll have to gently refuse. Guess it’s time to finish up that blanket…

- Two months til home.